Tired

Have you ever gotten to a point where you're just tired. Like not just physically but emotionally and mentally as well? It exhausting and to try and act like nothing is wrong is even more tiring. You can't get out of bed, you don't want to do anything, you're just not yourself. 

Well lately i've been feeling like that. I haven't been myself and people are starting to notice. It's sad because i feel like this is just one of my phases that i have to just let pass. Growing up the way that i did i never relied on many people. I was always told to take care of myself and not to let people think i'm weak. I was taught wrong. I know it's okay to let people in because they are here to help. Just watch who you talk to. Cause some people are true but others are just nosey and want to be in your business. I know this for a fact because i've been backstabbed, betrayed, and burned too many times to count. It's said when people use what you say against you or try to take advantage of you. 

Anyways back to be tired. It started earlier this semester,  actually before school started. I've been dealing with my grandmother and her illness. That just alone has taken it's toll on me. Seeing my grandmother in that position and her not knowing who i am hurt. I never thought that it would hurt this bad but it does and it's still hurting. I love my grandmother dearly and i would do anything for her. Right now i'm petitioning to get guardianship over her. I love my nana as well but i know for a fact that i can do a better job with taking care of business. I may not know everything but i try to find out what i need to know and get what i need to get done. I hate that my family is going through this right now. I just wish people maid better choices when it comes to our loved ones. 

Well on top of that i've been dealing with school and focusing on graduating. I've rearranged my priorities and some people don't like that. Well i value my school and life more than anything else. As i always say, "(such and such) is not paying my bills or giving me a degree, so therefore (such and such) has no top priority in my life." People also don't understand that i need my time. I need to focus on what i came here to do and that's what i'm going to do whether you like it or not. At this point i could care less and some people may be mad but i don't care. I gotta do what's right for Brittany! Come next semester my focus and goal is for GRADUATION ONLY! Nothing else matters.

Being tired is not cool, it not only affects your body but your mind and soul as well. I've been taking the time to talk to God one on one because i know that He is the only one that can take care of me and my problems. I know without God i would be nothing, i wouldn't have anything and i wouldn't be where i am today. He has provided me with all my needs plus more. So therefor i give Him all the praise, the honor and the glory that He deserves. I thank Him for my good and bad days because i know that without the bad days i would learn how to appreciate the good days. He is my Savior, my Prince of Peace, my Deliver, my Protector, my Provider, my Shelter, my Doctor, and my Father. 
To God be the Glory plus more!
Peace